Feelings. We tend to get our feelings out of balance: we feel too much and our feelings drive our actions or we feel too little and we act without emotion at all. Angry people tend to feel too much about themselves and their situation and not feel enough about the people who are the recipients of their anger. We can say it this way, Anger is self-centered and overly focused on our own feelings.
Anger feels differently in all of us. Can we identify with any of these feelings? 1) Fear or threat. Life is out of control, we face loss of people or possessions, we face resentment, or we feel the need to protect ourselves. 2) Misunderstood. If others would listen to us, we would not be angry. 3) Fatigue. We am at the end of our rope or this is the final straw. 4) Injustice ignored. We feel we have been wronged. 5) Depression. We feel hopeless and burned out. 6) Guilt and shame. We feel worthless or like we need to protect ourselves.
We feel mistreated and weak, yet we are being blamed for being angry and prideful. We feel that the accusation of being angry is a bad rap or at least misses the point. We feel no one understands, therefore, our anger is justified.
There are steps to be taken: 1) Know that God understands and we can take our emotions to Him and trust Him to work justly. 2) Recognize the spiritual battle that we are all facing and that Satan is seeking to distract us from focusing on God's work in us and those around us. 3) Humble ourselves and seek to understand the other person's perspective. They are likely feeling many of the same things that we are feeling. 4) Seek for the right means and time to express our feelings without anger driving the conversation. 5) Recognize that in a fallen world we desperately need God's grace and power to work in us and those around us. We are to seek God's glory in all that we DO and SAY even in a broken world. 6) Remember that Christ suffered wrongfully and felt the same things we feel, yet He responded in love rather than anger.